Monday: Today I was informed of my test results and was feeling super excited to finally have a diagnosis. I felt confident that now that we are aware of the specific problem that I will be feeling better soon. I went in for my vitamin C IV and was feeling pretty buzzed and hopeful. A woman in the IV room educated me on her three year journey with babesia and what has and hasn't worked for her. I took some notes and it definitely planted a seed on how long this new journey may be, but I was still feeling excited so it didn't concern me too much.
Tuesday: I began taking my new medication, Mepron. Within 15 minutes I couldn't keep my eyes open and fell asleep. I woke up feeling ten times worse with severe fatigue, pain, and exhaustion. I began to feel a little worried that the medicine was making me so sick. I know that I will be on this medication for a minimum of nine months and can't imagine feeling like this daily! I know it can take time to adapt to new medications so I figured I would wait and see how I felt in the morning. Today was my birthday and I was in bed by 7pm!
Wednesday: I felt even worse! I was now officially worried and emailed my doctor to find out if this is normal and how long I should expect to feel like this. I spent the day in bed except for a couple of clients. I feel lucky most of my clients are one hour sessions so I can mentally tell myself that I only need to push through 60 minutes and can return home to rest.
Thursday: I have to say this was my worst day this week. I'm not sure if it was a case of the "Mepron Blues" or it was the culmination of three rough days in a row or dealing with the reality of the diagnosis but I was in a funk. I started struggling with the thoughts that a year ago I was healthier on my birthday than I am now. Last year at this time I was a year into my Gullain Barre recovery and knew that I had an anticipated three more years of recovery but each one would be getting better. Surprise! I never thought I would be dealing with an entirely new rare disease. Part of me knew it was the medication causing my funk because I am generally highly optimistic and resilient. I went in for my IV and wanted to just give up and leave so many times. It was a torturous three hours because I just wanted to be home in my own bed and I was feeling worse and worse. I am so glad I stayed because a couple hours later it started to kick in and I was feeling better just in time to push through a couple more clients. I got home feeling exhausted but happy that I am still able to do what I love. I told myself that tomorrow would be a new day and I just needed a little more time to wrap my head around it and come up with an educated plan. Again, in bed by 7pm!
Friday: I feel like I have been poisoned. It sort of feels like a weird hangover. I feel better mentally though. I am still trying to wrap my head around voluntarily taking a medication that makes me feel soooo much worse. I am extremely in tune with my body and try to listen to what it needs on a daily basis and every part of my body is telling me not to take this medicine. I decided that it is time to go deeper into research mode today and try to understand the risks and rewards of any alternative treatments.
One woman told me the most effective method she used was Ozone Therapy where they mix your blood with ozone and run it back into your body so I thought I would check on that first. Well, from what I have read so far, the risks outweigh the rewards. Something inside me is telling me that is not the route to go on and it doesn't really have to do with what I read but just listening to my intuition.
I cracked open my super thorough book, Healing with Whole Foods: Oriental Traditions and Modern Nutrition, but my eyes seem to glaze over just flipping through the index for something that fit the bill. I am going to try looking at it again tomorrow with a fresh brain because it is a highly valuable resource.
There is a highly effective natural antibiotic called Cryptolepis that is successful in treating malaria but when I asked my doctor about it he said we can't add any other supplements in at this point because my body is struggling too much on the current protocol. I am going in on Monday to discuss our plan further and plan on spending the weekend learning as much as I can!
I would have to say that this is a fairly typical mind journey through my varied health crisis' over the past several years. It is a bit of a roller coaster! I think I always start on a high, thinking once we know the problem it will be simple to fix. Then the realization that it is not so simple sinks in. Then the worry about the journey ahead begins. Then the research phase begins in an effort to get a better understanding of what I am dealing with and the alternative therapies and remedies that are available. Then the resiliency kicks in and planning to heal begins. Although it is a roller coaster, it is a familiar one so there is a certain comfort in that!
After completing my research I have decided to go against medical advice and create my own healing plan. To find out more you will have to wait for my next post!
*After Note: I ended up in the hospital with seizures, convulsions, tremors and paralyzation the day after writing this and never posted the protocol I came up with....